Soooo.....

Right then,

Apparently some strange people like reading my rants and believe that I should start a blog.

Okey Dokey, done.

Now, as for what to put as my first post, well that is another story. Part of me wanted to post something deep and meaningful, but recent facebook posts have me tapped out of that. So, something witty and fun, yeah, thats not happening. So, I think I will have to settle on a "Journey so far" kind of deal. Or at least a shortened version of that.

So, I am studying, crafting, and dealing with life's ever changing sense of humor.

Study
I am studying a Bachelor of Arts, majoring in English Literature and History and minoring in Anthropolgy (yes I can say that drunk). This will lead to teaching, specifically High School, in the end, which with any luck will be in 2 and a half years. I started this in November 2007 after realised I had spent the first 5 years of my life after highschool aimlessly wandering the earth and not having any idea what the hell I was going to do with my life. I study externally, which means I don't go to campus, I don't see my lecturers, but I do get support and email and all that jazz.

Craft
I have always been creative, writing stories, poems, drawing (poorly), and then I found Scrapbooking. Oh what a day that was. My sister had a Creative Memories party at her place, and instantly I loved it. Though rather quickly I found that my style and everyone elses differed greatly. I love looking at other peoples work, but I do so and think "Thats beautiful... but I don't like it" more and more often. Which I realise is horrible of me, and I will never say that to them, but there are so many times I look at other peoples work and think "Are they high?" other times I look at other peoples work and have to supress the sudden and intense jealousy I feel at their talents. ANYWAYS... there was a challenge on a forum I was a member of to make a card. I tried, and in my opinon failed... miserably. But that planted a seed. I had so many scraps, and cards were small... so I messed around, failed some more, then found a groove, a rhythm if you will. Pretty soon I kept haveing family and friends tell me "They are good, you should sell them" (but they never buy any... *Insert note here to grumble some other time about this*. I have been card-making ever since, and really do enjoy it.

Dealing with life's ever changing sense of humor.
This is definately the one that takes the most time in my daily routine, and I am definately trying to cope better, but eh, shit happens and sometimes I take a few steps back. So, life's sense of humor.

Take one painfully stubbourn, independant, strong, unrelenting girl.
Add lifetime of schoolyard teasing.
Mix together
Get --- One painfully stubbourn, independant, strong, woman who is finally relenting a little bit of herself to deal with the emotions that she had denied so long.

Don't forget to throw other events in there, such as a long-term partner who had commitment issues, anger issues, trust issues, love issues... lets just summarise with issues, which did not help when I needed help etc. A few meltdowns, a million steps forward, 999,999 steps back and a whole array of other things that I will likely get to at some point on here.

So where am I at now?

Well that I am not sure of. I am disorganised, insecure, emotional, a little crazy.... alright alot crazy, but I think that I am in a good place. I have a partner now (just over a year YAY) who picks up on the tiniest of changes and supports and loves me. Mentally I think I am more stable than I was a year ago, physically I am getting there.. that will take a while, emotionally... baby steps.

So, thats me, this is my blog, I will try not to have many posts like this which jump and change and ooooohhh shiney!

:) If you are reading this, you are either bored, or love me. Either way, I am pretty sure that you are a friend. Thanks.

Dani